Sunday, October 30, 2011

Blue Jeans Blues

A few days back, Lovely Daughter #2 helped me sort through my closet and get rid of clothes that don't fit, or don't flatter, or I simply don't wear. By the time we were through, we had several bags of good stuff for charity.

My jeans took the biggest hit. I own eight pairs of jeans, total: one white, two black, and five blue.

For a gal who spends about 95% of her life in jeans, that's not much. It also means that they wear out pretty fast, as I do everything from garden to walk the dogs to wipe up spills in my jeans.

Okay, not the white ones; those are strictly for garden parties and the like.

The white pair and the two black pairs were given the thumbs up from LD#2.

The other five pairs? Not so much.

She especially hated these jeans:

I thought they looked pretty good on me, but when she took a photo of me on her cell phone from behind, I saw the ugly truth.

The pockets make my backside look horrible!

The pockets are too pattern-y, too wideset, and they tilt away from the midline of the back in a very steep angle, which all contribute to making my butt look like a doublewide trailer.

She didn't have much to say about these, either:

Too faded, too sad.

Some of my jeans are Not Your Daughter's Jeans, a brand that fits me nicely:

But, alas, one of my NYDJ jeans suffers from terminal bleach splash:

This pattern of bleach spots may look cute on a 20something, or on an allover pattern. But on one thigh on a gal who last saw the inside of a Labor and Delivery room 19 years ago, it's just sad:

I also own a couple pairs of Joe's Jeans, a brand that has stayed trendy for quite a while now. This is a closeup of the back right pocket on one pair of my Joes':

...and this is the back left pocket. The one where my cell phone has rubbed a hole clean through:

My cell phone habit has been very hard on my other pair of Joe's, too:

Holes don't belong on anybody over the age of 29, unless you're a rocker in your 60s and you're still singing, despite your overly collagen-ed lips. You guys get a pass. The rest of us, not so much.

So, with some degree of sadness, I folded up five pairs of blue jeans--all the blue jeans I own:

By the way, that bow, below, came with the top pair of jeans, there. Shows you how much they've faded:

The jeans will go to Goodwill, where they'll either be sold as is or be turned into cash-worthy recyclable fabric.

But first, I had to empty all the pockets. I found five doggy-poop bags and a Cheerio.

'Cuz that's just how I roll.


  1. It was nice of you to collect jeans that no longer fit and donating it to those who are in need. Were there any pairs that you decided to hold on to despite how it fits?

  2. Hi . . Juli . . .I suppose this will be an odd comment . . .I arrived here via Google Images. I am a technology type (we've "launched" two) and I write music too. I wrote kind of a fun bluegrass tune about "Blue Jeans" I am about to load up and I wanted to add a picture to the iTunes file. yours were the best pics and I wanted to ask your permission if I could use it. The fact is only my family is likely to ever see it, but . . .anyway. I could not figure out how to email you, so perhaps you could email me? Happy to send the tune of course. Eric H.; www. (album 3 . .the prerelease stuff is up there). Anyway . . nbd. let me know!

  3. nice jean but black color is my favorit



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